As a society, we must move beyond narrow definitions of success and recognize that every woman’s path is valid.
What does it mean for a woman to flourish? Is it about her career accomplishments, her role as a wife or mother, or how seamlessly she integrates both? For me, these questions aren’t just hypothetical—they’ve followed me at every stage of my life, like an ever-present shadow of societal expectations.
As a woman who chose to remain single, I’ve often felt the weight of assumptions about what my life should look like. Who will care for me in old age? Occasionally, these questions carry a faint undertone of judgment. Society still views a woman’s flourishing as tied to the roles she plays in others’ lives—wife, mother, caregiver—rather than according to her own self-defined path.
Interestingly, no one questioned my commitment to higher education or my love for my career. But as soon as I completed my doctorate, the narrative shifted. “You’ve accomplished so much; isn’t it time to focus on your personal life?” Some would even tease me: “Stop being so busy. Go find a boyfriend!” The societal applause for a woman’s professional achievements often comes with a footnote: now, move on to the next step. But what if that “next step” is defined not by society but by the woman herself?
When I did my dissertation, which explored women’s well-being, I encountered six remarkable women who shared deeply personal stories of navigating these expectations while pursuing their own definitions of fulfillment. The story of “Robin” (not her real name), in particular, is a compelling example of how women could make intentional choices and flourish on their own terms.
Robin always knew she wanted to be a mother. Early in her marriage, she made the deliberate choice to put her career on pause in favor of starting a family. For some, this might seem like a step back, a sacrifice of professional aspirations. But for Robin, it was never a compromise—it was her choice.
Robin shared: “My husband and I decided to prioritize having children first.” Her decision reflected not only her personal values but also societal expectations that placed motherhood at the center of a woman’s identity. While Robin embraced this role wholeheartedly, she never saw it as the end of her aspirations.
When Robin decided to resume her professional career, she received support from her husband who took his share of domestic responsibilities and who encouraged her to pursue her goals at every stage. The organizations she worked for also played a vital role. Flexible schedules and supportive policies allowed her to rediscover her professional identity while still prioritizing her family.
“Focusing on my family doesn’t mean I’ll stop everything else,” she reflected. This dynamic approach—leaning into family at one stage and career at another—illustrates how flourishing is not a linear journey but a continuous negotiation between life’s demands and personal values.
At every stage of her journey, Robin exercised personal agency, reflecting on her priorities and making intentional choices. She didn’t see her roles as mother and professional as competing. Instead, she viewed them as parts of a cohesive whole.
Her ability to flourish was not just a product of her individual choices but also of the structures and relationships that enabled her to act on them. Her husband’s encouragement and the flexibility afforded by her workplace, among others, contributed to her success.
Robin’s story challenges traditional narratives about what it means for a woman to flourish. It shows that there is no singular pathway to fulfillment—no universal formula that every woman must follow. For Robin, flourishing meant choosing motherhood first, returning to her career later, and continuously adapting as her circumstances evolved.
But her story also underscores an important truth: while women have the power to define their own flourishing, they cannot do it alone. Agency is essential, but so is support—from partners, workplaces, and society at large. Flexible workplace policies, equitable responsibilities at home, and cultural shifts that value diverse pathways collectively create an environment where women can thrive. Robin’s story reminds us that flourishing is not a fixed endpoint or checklist of accomplishments. It is a dynamic, evolving process of making intentional choices and adapting to life’s changes.
As a society, we must move beyond narrow definitions of success and recognize that every woman’s path is valid. Whether prioritizing family, pursuing a career, or integrating both, flourishing looks different for everyone. What matters is that women have the freedom and resources to choose what fulfills them.
Jessica is the Assistant Dean for External Affairs and Lasallian Mission of the Ramon V. del Rosario College of Business and is an associate professor in the Department of Decision Sciences and Innovation at De La Salle University. She earned both her Doctor of Business Administration and Master of Business Administration degrees from the same institution. Jessica can be contacted at jessica.ranieses@dlsu.edu.ph.
The perspectives shared in this piece are solely the author’s and do not necessarily represent the official views of De La Salle University, its faculty, or its administration.
